sinking ship

*disclaimer: its very late (or early depending on how you look at it) and I have been drinking, because on days like today, what else can you do really?*

So I went away to Vancouver, cleared my head and had some much needed R and R. I actually got some sleep and everything. I was also reminded just how wonderful my friends are. Love you folks ;)
When I returned to Kamloops I felt prepared to handle whatever this town had to throw at me. And for the first couple of days it really seemed like things were starting to improve. The performances were stronger, and everything was starting to come together.
No major drama
even a bit routine
I get to the theatre around 4:30pm to start preset for a show that starts between 8:40 and 9:15pm. If you've ever worked on a show, I don't have to tell you, that is bordering on ridiculous. But I do it anyway, cause there is that much work to be done and I can't seem to slack off even if I want to.
Then today, my job got that much harder.
Buddy pushed too far as I understand it and we lost our director. Normally after a show opens I would say 'whatever', but we are still working the show and we have a new cast member arriving next week and the director was going to come back to 'direct' those rehearsals.
I am now officially a one woman army.
I have been painfully clear with the company with regards to the role of the SM and what I am prepared and not prepared to do. And yet, I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place. Who fills the void? We don't have a director, musical director, choreographer, playwright, dramaturge, designer, PM...
When the question was asked in our meeting this evening, all eyes looked to me... you?
No.
So then what, it becomes a collective creation with a room full of producers watching from the sidelines adding their two cents when they feel moved? I'm not interested in being in the room during those rehearsals. boo. I am certain that with that approach, the bottom of this ship will be blown out from under us and we will all sink.
I'm not quite sure how these next few weeks will pan out, but I think my work load and my job description just got a lot heftier. I think I might start by finding some good TED talks ( a good director introduced me to those once) and then I think we should return to the beginning. What is the story that we are trying to tell? What do you want?

Bloody hell.
The funny thing about being the last woman standing on the design/ production team is that suddenly I am a hero without even trying and everything I do is golden (even the way in which I braid my hair). lol
flattery will get you everywhere.
So that's the news on the Kamloops front. I need to jet though, reports to write and whatnot...
peace
Cmax